Sometimes i sit here and i think about how we started dating. I like to think about how we started really talking again and how i didn’t think you liked me at first, I just thought you wanted to reconnect and be friends again. I told Breigh a million times that you probably didn’t really like me and it was all in my head. And then I think back to that moment when you finally kissed me and all of my thoughts before that didn’t matter. Because you know what mattered? You. You were the only thing that mattered. You’re still the only thing that matters. You were the only thing that mattered on that wooden swing in my front yard 10 years ago and you’re the only thing that matters now.

I love you.

i know you’re still checking up on me, and i know you’re reading this. just so you know, i check up on you, too.

i love taylor.
i absolutely fucking love him.
not just because he’s the most amazing human being i’ve ever met
(but i’m a little biased)
but because of all the people he’s brought into my life
because i’ve fallen in love with them, too.

thanks to taylor, i have three loves of my life
(obviously with him being the most important)
he’s the only thing that matters,
that matters that much anyway.
but he’s led me to other boys that matter.
he’s led me to the other loves of my life.

because of him i’ve met two of the greatest boys men i’ve ever met
and they have come to mean the world to me.
so special shouts,
to my main man taylor for helping me realize that not all men are pieces of shit.
not all men are trash.
some of them are actually pretty fucking alright.

sometimes i wonder if you miss me.
sometimes i wonder if you still think about me.

you lost the fucking game. you’re the one that left. you’re the one that forgot. you’re the one that didn’t fucking come back so don’t say those things to me. don’t play those games with me because it doesn’t matter anymore. it won’t fucking matter again. YOU LOST. i could’ve been the best thing that ever happened to you. and you had your chance and you missed the fucking window and that’s your own damn fault.

i’m in love and don’t try and screw that up for me. don’t try to play those games with me. don’t say those things to me and try and change things or make things the way they were again because they aren’t and they won’t ever be.

it’s not the same.

i’m not the same.

just please fucking don’t.

hickeys remember
reminding me that I’m yours
small notes on my skin

*passes the fuck out because of your beauty*

WHAAAAT?! shit, bree, if i had half of your beauty.

is this fate though? is fate how you came back into my life? is it fate how we still happened, how you left and came back? is this fate?

or is fate how you never really left in the first place?

I just know that this man is going to be in my life for a very very very long time and I don’t intend to fuck it up.

I don’t know if I believe in god. I don’t know if I believe in anything but I thank him, or whatever it is, every single day that I have you.

sometimes i’m like god babies are so cute i want one so bad i should have one and then other times i’m like why babies are gross they literally shit on themselves and cry that’s all they do yuck.

you’re still perfect

sometimes I just wanna cry because I just feel like you don’t love me as much as I love you and that sucks.

sometimes you piss me off so much I can’t see straight. but then sometimes I love you so much I can’t see straight and this is why I need glasses.

I can’t explain how good it feels to wake up next to you in the morning. How I know it’s going to be a good day, only because the first thing I saw was your face. because the first thing I felt we’re your arms around me. because the first thing I heard was you breathing.

I just love you. more than anything.